Recipe for an emotional cleanse
The recipe will call to mind specific people and
events and ask you to take certain actions,
always erring on the mature expression of your
emotions, rather than an immature expression
1. Cleanse anger
Identify the people at whom you are angry.
Once identified, the recipe calls for you to write
down the mature expression of your issue (not
the immature one). Once you are clear on your
adult position on the issue, the road forward
will be obvious.
2. Cleanse guilt
Identify people you have wronged and of whom
you need to ask forgiveness. Identify specifically
what you did or how you acted poorly toward
each person and what, if any, restitution you
feel is appropriate. Make plans to act on your
3. Cleanse negative memories you are
Write a list of negative memories that still
bother you. Once you have your list, review
each memory completely and from a distance.
Imagine you are viewing the memory as a
neutral observer from a safe and comfortable
distance. Ask yourself what there is to learn
from each memory. Record your thoughts.
Notice the specific words you use to criticize
yourself. Take a paper and pencil and write the
words self-criticism at the top. Then, write down
all the phrases the come to mind that you use to
beat yourself up. Don’t censor yourself. Review
each phrase, curious about its origins. Next,
completely clear your mind by listening
passively but intently to some mundane sound
in your immediate environment (the sound of a
refrigerator motor, a fan, the hum of your
computer of the distant traffic). Once you are
settled and clear, throw the paper away.
5. Develop resources
Finally, immerse yourself in a positive memory,
seeing what you saw at the time, hearing what
you heard and feeling what you felt. Imagine
many, many more of these positive memories
being scattered into your future. By ending on a
positive note and casting positivity into your
future, you set the stage for good things to
come. Positive expectations and optimism are
linked to health and longevity.
The moral of the story: Take charge of your
emotional health. Consciously process your
emotions. Don’t allow stress to dictate your state
of being. When this happens, your mind and
body become a habitat in which disease is more
likely to flourish. This is a proven fact.
If you cannot complete the emotional cleanse on
your own, get some help and support in the
process. It is that important.